Think for the Southern Baptists: A Special Message From the Southern Atheist Convention

This Fall, the Southern Baptist Convention is issuing a booklet urging its members to pray for Hindus during the time of Divali, a religious festival dedicated to the goddess Lakshmi. The booklet describes Hinduism as "hopeless darkness" and tells Southern Baptists that Hindus don't understand the concept of personal responsibility, an interesting perspective on a religion which emphasizes elevation of the self over many lives through the accumulation of good karma.

This latest prayer advisory is in addition to past admonitions to pray for the lost souls who follow the fallen paths of Judaism and Islam. The Southern Baptist Convention says that it is also working on a prayer campaign against Buddhists. Oops - we meant to say for Buddhists.

We at the Southern Atheist Convention feel sorry for the Southern Baptists, who have so clearly fallen away from the righteous path of using their heads. Their illiteracy has led them into ignorance, worshiping a God who is not a god because, well, he does not exist. We feel sorry for the Southern Baptists who have lost their minds in the hopeless darkness of blind faith.

So, as we come up to the Southern Baptists' religious festival of Christmas, we encourage all atheists, and particularly members of the Southern Atheist Convention, to think for the Southern Baptists. Jesus knows they won't think for themselves.

Bless you, oh lambs of learning.